As I was praying before bed last night, I was praying for “happiness”. But what goes into being “happy”? As I have stated before, I am not here to push my religious views on my readers but I am also not going to hold back my beliefs and experiences. With that being said, I am a firm believer that God provides you with what you need, but you have to do your part as well in order to receive it. He is going to supply the boat, the net and the bait… it is your job to take the boat on the water and throw the net to catch the fish.
I have made a pie chart of what I believe is the “key to happiness”… the things that you need to be secure and content with in life in order to truly make you secure and content and HAPPY in life. Clearly, this isn’t the actual key to success, your chart might be different, but this is what I have seen to be true in many lives… let me know what you think.
.
.
I have somewhat broken these down into order, but of course, it may alter based on situation and/or timing.
1. Faith: Again, I don’t mean to offend anyone if religion isn’t your cup of tea but this doesn’t necessarily mean religion. I, for one, believe in God and the power that He has. Others may believe in the universe and nature. Some may believe in another spirit. Some may not have any belief of anything. I trust that this is first and foremost. For my “pie chart”, to be happy and secure in life, I must be happy and secure in my relationship with God. I know that I have a solid relationship with God, that He has made the world the way it is for a reason – that He has made me the way I am for a reason, He has a plan for me, He knows me – He knows my strengths, weaknesses, worries, dreams… I trust that He will take care of me and I to Him. Because of this, I can then focus on who He needs me to be and who I want to be… which leads me to the second most important…
2. Yourself: If don’t love yourself and can be happy with the person you are… change it. It may be a long process, it may be overnight, but if this is lacking… everything else will lack as well. This has always been a struggle for me and my “pie chart” because I’ve never felt confident in myself or who I was other than one time in my life yet I don’t know how to get back to that person. Find what you want to represent, be who you would be inspired by and don’t let anyone dull that sparkle. Don’t let anyone tell you who you are, because you will know the truth. You always hear “if you can’t love yourself, how can you let anyone else”… which brings in the next chunk of importance…
3. Family/Friends/Relationship: Family is forever. Like every family, there are always broken pieces but like every family, there is unconditional love that is spread. You have to have family around you to support you, lift you up when you’re down and to guide you when you can’t see yourself. I think friends can also be considered family. Finding true friends can be difficult, very difficult. But once you find the people who make you the better version of yourself, who will also support you, guide you and lift you up when you are down and can be the ones you run to then you are set. Be cautious of who you allow into this category because danger can hide in disguise very easily. The same goes with a relationship. If you decide a relationship is best for you, make sure the significant other is the best for you. Don’t allow things that you wouldn’t allow your friends or family to go through. Always be you and if you find someone who loves that person and can grow with, great, but if there are any red flags… trust your gut. Having a partner in life may not be your thing, that’s fine too, so don’t force what you don’t think you want/need. On the other hand, if God (or the universe) brings a person into your life that fills that part of your heart and your life, don’t let them slip away.
4. Career: A job is where you spend 80% of your time; 10% spent outside of work and 10% sleeping, eating or doing chores. You must, MUST, be happy in your job or everything else won’t satisfy you either. Not only must you be happy in what you do, but the environment you do it in. This can be tricky because you may love the environment but hate your job… or you might love your job but hate the environment… would this be a deal breaker? For me, yes. I have been in that situation and it is a big factor. If you have to dread going to work the next day, that’s a sign one of these is off. If you jump out of bed ready to go, cherish that. Ask yourself what you want to do, is that realistic? Ask yourself what you are good at, can you somewhere that enhances that trait? My mom always told us, “Do you see yourself at a desk, in a factory, in a hospital, in a classroom? What do you see yourself wearing? Scrubs, dress clothes, casual, a uniform?”… break down what you see yourself doing then find a career that matches that description. Don’t be afraid to try and try again until you find the one that makes you jump out of bed, not dread the next day.
5. Hobbies/Activities: When you come home from your job, when you’re not spending time with your family and friends… you are doing what? Mine would be watching movies, writing, playing in makeup or cooking. These are the things that I find to make me “happy”. What is it that you do that takes your mind off of reality and takes you to a place of purity? Don’t know what that is? Try different things. My sister does yoga and cares for plants, my mom plays piano and creates art, my dad rebuilds cars and likes yard work. Everyone has their “thing” about them, find yours and find the time to always do that during the weeks in order to maintain happiness when other parts of the chart are failing.
6. Home: I did put this last, because I feel some people need the reassurance but in my life it doesn’t relate. Making sure you feel secure at your own home is a very big factor in life in general. If something about it seems dangerous or uncomfortable… find somewhere else to be physically. Like I mentioned, possibly 20% of your time is at home and that is a place where you need to feel truly “at home”, if you don’t… find somewhere or someone who does feel like home to you. A warm, comfortable, safe and secure place for you to always go.
.
.
As I said before, this doesn’t have to match what you need in life or maybe it is but the chunks are bigger/smaller. Whatever it is that fills your chart of happiness, always focus on making them bigger and better in order to succeed in life. You can’t do anything successfully without being content in it to begin with. Starting this week I am challenging myself, and anyone who wants to chime in, to rebuild myself in every section of this chart to regain and maintain happiness in my life. I may not be 110% sure of what I will do in this challenge but that is also the beauty in it. What would you do? What do you do?